holidays be damned

so its almost that damn time of year again. :-P the holidays. i remeber being a little girl and being so excited for turkey day and xmas and all that stuff. now that im older i think im turning in to a scrooge. well not really, but this year i am. ive got no job and noone seems to want to give me one. which means that santa cant come here to see austin. and to top it all off, im stuck going to jims families house. for the third damn year in a row.i want to go see my family.but they live in nj which is like a 3 hour drive from here and his parents live in pennslyvania which is only just over the border. this has been the fight for a few days now. i dont wanna go to his house cuz his family doesnt seem to like me anymore and i know that im starting to not like them anymore. when im there they just ignore me anyway. and who needs that shit. if they do speak to me its just something that will piss me off. so i tried to comprimise with jim. i said fine well go to your house for turkey day but were going to mine for xmas. no deal. i said why not?he said well dont you think i should be with my family since im going away? and i said yea but were going there for turkey day. (they only live five minutes away,we see them every week) and he says well dont you think i should spend as much time with them as possible. and i said fine then you go there and ill go to my house for xmas. and hes like well dont you want to spend it with me? and i said yea jim but id like to see my family.i havent seen my sister in like 4 months and my brother its been over a year. my sister is very fragile, shes 15 and thats a fragile age anyway. but almost 2 and a half years ago our mom passed away. and its really hard for her. and id like to be there to help her out bc her fathers a moron. and i just need to be with my family sometimes too. my family at least talks to him while hes there.then hes like well we can go there the weekend after. um hello we can go to your families the weekend after. and its just this big damn fight over some stupid holidays. and if your gonna be fighting well who really cares about the holiday anyway? ya know? im really feeling the urge to play sick on thursday so i dont have to go to his parents and then sneak over to my grannies. at least theyll talk to me.so holidays be damned. theyre just a battle anymore.....be back tomorrow. hopefully in a happier mood