ive decided that....

ive decided that the government hates me. and that life fucking sucks. and that i really hold no hope for these next 14 months that jims gone.

i finally got my ass out of bed. you know what i mean,from like being utterly depressed. and when im done this im going right back in it. today i went to go file for child support,and apply for food stamps and medical assistance for austin. all that crap. i qualify for none of the government assistance. none. i make too much money they say. which is amazing to me,bc i cant afford to get food. before taxes i make 350 a week. after i make 285. so in total after taxes, i make 1140 a month. ok $600 goes to my rent. $400 goes to the babysitter. $115 goes to car insurance and the rest is gas. ive got nothing left over. nothing. but bc before taxes i make more, i dont qualify. its fucking unbelievable to me. i cant afford to feed me and austin,but i make too much damn money? how can they include money you dont even have,or recieve? and the child support? yea i have to pay for that too. so all in all, the government has stolen my man away and said fuck you starve and die.

im going to bed. i dont have anything positive to say. i see no happy outlook anymore. fuck it.

fuck everything im done.